Acquired Taste(s)

As a child, I never understood it when an adult would say something was an "acquired taste." If you tried something and didn't like it that should it...end of story. Why would I need to try something many times in order to like it?

And yet, as I've gotten older (read: fatter/grayer) I've discovered that there are many things that I know love that a long time ago I didn't like.

Olives. Olives are a good example of this. When I was a kid I wouldn't go near an olive. I don't even remember trying them and not liking them...I just didn't like them. I guess it was because the black ones, when sliced and put on a pizza, look a bit like shriveled bugs. Yuck, who wants THAT in their mouth?

Coffee. I used to think coffee was the biggest con adults played on children. Every morning my parents would wake up literally CRAVING the stuff. But what was so special about it? It tasted like dirty water. Any drink you have to "dress up" with sugar and milk can't be all that great to begin with, right? But over time (and many late-night "study" sessions) I've come to love coffee. In fact, when I'm working on one of my novels I tend to drink a pot a day. And I wonder why my teeth are so yellow...speaking of which...

Cigarettes. Cigarettes are fantastic. I won't lie kids--smoking kills and I don't do it anymore, but nicotine is the shit. The euphoria one gets from a puff off a fag can't be beat. And that first puff of the day? Forget about it. I've written about my history with smoking (go look it up) so I'll spare you the details about how I initially was skeptical about tobacco. Needless to say, if you do it enough you "acquire" the taste (read: develop a crippling addiction).

Beer. See a pattern here? Everything that's horrible/terrible for you seems to be an acquired taste. Maybe saying something is an "acquired taste" is just our way of saying "please let me kill myself in peace"? Anyway, beer used to taste pretty shitty to me but now I really enjoy beer (tastes just as good coming back up, too).

Ham. Growing up, my sister Amber and I were pretty much opposed to all forms of pork (with the notable exception of bacon) . Over the past few years though, my stance on bacon has softened a bit. Just this past weekend I ordered a pizza with ham and pineapple on it. And I love a good pulled pork sandwich. I'm not sure what happened exactly...one day I just said to myself "Ah hell, I'll give pork another chance." I'm still not a fan of the pork chop, however.

Diet Soda. If there's a better example of "acquired taste" I don't know what it is. Growing up I INSISTED on drinking regular soda (I have the gut to prove it). About a year ago my wife snookered me into trying a carb diet (read: eat nothing delicious). I was so desperate for soda that I let her convince me to try drinking diet soda. And guess what? After three months of no sugar, COKE Zero tasted pretty damn good. Now I can't drink the regular stuff (too sweet).

I feel like we can program our taste buds. The diet soda example is pretty good proof of this. As a child the psychology what we like or don't like is probably just as much a factor as ACTUAL taste. Like the ham I just decided to give "another shot," the things that are acquired tastes don't change. We change. An acquired taste basically when you "stop worrying and learn to love the ham. "

There's Five Calories in my Diet Ginger Ale

Seriously. What is the deal with these 5 calories?

I've never been a "diet soda" drinker until a year ago. After a stint as a vegetarian, I decided to go the other way and participate in a "carb diet." What this meant was my dietary needs went from "Brontosaurus" to "Tyrannosaurus Rex." Anyway, as part of this diet, I quit consuming sugar. Sure enough, I became a diet soda drinker.

I'm not gonna lie to you, it doesn't taste the same. But now that I've acclimated my taste buds to it, I prefer diet to regular soda (which is now insanely sweet-tasting to me). That said I don't care for Diet Pepsi and I loath Diet Coke.

No friends, you want a delicious soft drink (and still fit into last year's swimsuit)? I recommend COKE ZERO. Coke Zero is amazing. What amazes me about is that, while both Diet Coke and Coke Zero are made by the same company (Coca-Cola) they're completely different products.

How can I explain this to a non-diet soda drinker?

Diet Coke tastes like a regular Coke mixed with a cup of water and left out in the sun all day (where it bakes). Coke Zero is like a more nimble, sexier version of Coke--the version that can do the spilts (and wears cut-off shorts).

Anyway, most "diet" sodas have no: sugar, carbs, or calories. What they DO have is a shit-load of sodium. That's why it's bad for you (still). However my wife recently found what I consider to be the "unicorn" of diet sodas--she found a Diet Ginger Ale.

Can you believe they make a Diet Ginger Ale? Me neither. I've been happily swilling it for two days now. Last night I watched the complete first season of AFRO SAMURAI (with Sam Jackson) and drank about three of those things. I was on my final soda of the night when I was looking at the can.

I was looking at the can because this is a crappy-store brand soda. What's the worst part about a store-brand soda? The can. The can always looks incredibly bad, like Pepsi and Coke paid the stores to use crappy can art to shame people into drinking the national brand.

Of course stupid rip-off names like "Mountain Lightning" and "Doctor Thunder" don't help either.

Anyway, this particular store-brand has a pretty cool can design...kinda abstract with a nice pretty green color to it. So instead of watching anime, I was studying my soda can.

As I was doing so, this caught my eye:

I did a double-take, that says "Low calorie" not "No Calorie."

I freaked out (for no particular reason) and spun the can around to check out the nutritional facts. Turns out one can of this "diet" soda has 5 measly calories.

WHAT THE HELL? Why couldn't they obliterate those last five calories? This soda is pretty good, but it's not better than any of the zero calorie sodas I've tasted. It seems like something with 5 calories should taste a little better than something with none, right?

I realize that I'm over-thinking all of this, but it's been bugging me all day. So I ask you "Super Chill Soda": Why does your Diet Ginger Ale have 5 calories?

I'm not sure if this is related, but I did notice that the amount of sodium is 0% (meaning there is no sodium). So perhaps that's the trade-off--instead of extreme levels of salt there's 5 calories.

Hmmm...

I guess I can live with that.