Whoa, watch out there!!! I know I’m kinda easy to miss—what with me being huge and all. Are you okay? Did I mess up your text message when you ran into me? I hope not. I mean, that’s one hell of an important message. After all, you were writing it while you were walking along. I know that you realize how stupidly dangerous it is to walk along in a crowded, public place with your eyes focused on a tiny electronic screen.
And I know you didn’t just come to the mall to send text messages. That would be like going to the movies just to send text messages…
No, no! It’s MY fault for foolishly turning that corner without making sure anyone was stomping along in UGG Boots with their head down and eyes glued to a cellphone screen. You’re not to be blamed. A teenage is like a doctor who’s “on-call,” you MUST be reachable by MySpace, Facebook, Instant-Messenger…24/7!!! Dear God, I shudder to think about what would happen if you weren’t able to Tweet your “peeps” about how some fat bloke ran into you when you were sprinting towards The Gap.
What’s that? My blood is giving you a bad reception? Here, let me wipe it off for your. There you go, good as new. No, no…don’t worry about me—you’re important! Go! Go to The Gap! Tweet about the snotty cashier, and tell your girlfriend about that club last night. If you don't...then the terrorist have won!
L8TR,
Jason
No, no! It’s MY fault for foolishly turning that corner without making sure anyone was stomping along in UGG Boots with their head down and eyes glued to a cellphone screen. You’re not to be blamed. A teenage is like a doctor who’s “on-call,” you MUST be reachable by MySpace, Facebook, Instant-Messenger…24/7!!! Dear God, I shudder to think about what would happen if you weren’t able to Tweet your “peeps” about how some fat bloke ran into you when you were sprinting towards The Gap.
What’s that? My blood is giving you a bad reception? Here, let me wipe it off for your. There you go, good as new. No, no…don’t worry about me—you’re important! Go! Go to The Gap! Tweet about the snotty cashier, and tell your girlfriend about that club last night. If you don't...then the terrorist have won!
L8TR,
Jason
